my baby just cares for me

so the ultrasound today was fun, and the technician assured me that he is perfect and ready to go – just gotta get the cervix to a favorable state! according to the measurements, he weighs seven pounds, ten ounces, but that doesn’t take into consideration bone density, so it could be a little higher or a little lower. her guess was that he will be right around eight pounds, which is fine with me as long as it’s eight pounds and some even number of ounces!

in other news, i learned about pagophagia today and it totally freaked me out. everyone knows how i have been eating ice like crazy for months now, and while i definitely used to do it before – grab an ice cube here and there as i headed out the door, or eating all the ice out of my glass at the dinner table after i was finished with my milk (yes, milk) – i’m way beyond that now. i bought an ice crusher for goodness sakes! anyway, pagophagia is a form of pica, which is an eating disorder where you basically eat non-food items compulsively. now, realistically, it could be a lot worse, right? i could be eating dirt or paint chips or starch, some of the more common and unfortunate pica “foods”, but i had no idea that massive quantities of ice could be included in that definition.

(d brought up the interesting point about water – why is ingesting ice at an alarming rate a diagnosable disorder, while drinking the same amount of water is recommended by most physicians? what is it about the solid form that shift it over to the non-food category?)

so now i can’t decide if i should mention this to my doctor or not. if it is pregnancy-induced, there’s almost no point. and it’s not like she hasn’t been taking blood all along – wouldn’t they know if i was anemic by now? part of me thinks i should just wait until next week, and part of me is like, holy shit! yet another weird freaky sort-of-psychological disease that i have! how can i be a good mom if i’m an ice-chomping, anxiety and depressive-disordered, attention deficited hyperactive?

i guess the only thing to hope for is if the kid is just as screwed up as i am!



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